Safari Picture Update #2
So then I set about reworking my treatment. As you know from these three posts, I started focusing on certain aspects of the script that made it more ensemble-like. The film is still not a "traditional" ensemble film, but with a few intersecting storylines it is related. I sent the revised treatment over to the producer yesterday, and should be speaking with him soon to discuss our status.
I feel that I definitely did a good job of getting a more cohesive story in there, and one which stuck more closely with their desires. I definitely cleaned it up a bit, but it still is probably more complex than it needs to be, and it may be simply a "killing my darlings" issue. I'll see. I'm also finding that I still have shortchanged one set of characters' story, and I'm not sure if they are really necessary at all. It may just be that I haven't fully connected them to the core, and that when I do, they may actually add quite a bit. Remains to be seen.
I think one of the biggest challenges I'm facing, in terms of meeting the producers' expectations, is one of realism vs. cinematic. They are pushing for this to be very realistic (which I'm all for), but at the same time many of the ideas that I have may be pushing the envelope a bit too much. Everything I mention could or even has happened, but the combination of all of them is where the realism breaks down somewhat. Whereas, if I stick purely to realism, it might be exciting in real life but it isn't a movie. So my challenge has been to strike the right balance between believable and exciting. I think I did a much better job of that in this version of the treatment, and hopefully will get even closer as we move closer to the final product.
So, that's that for now. After I speak with the producer I'll have a better idea of where we stand, when we'll be going down to Botswana (since they want to approve the treatment first), and what my next steps will be.